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Note to Readers: Once you get over the hill, you start to pick up speed, ne? And for the curious, the herbs named are, to the best of my knowledge and research, the sort of things which Filia might be inclined to use for such a purpose. Chapter Ten When she awoke, she was alone. For a few brief moments in the limbo between asleep and awake, all seemed fine. Nothing seemed changed. The door opened, and for a fleeting heartbeat as the last lingering traces of sleep evaporated, there was the respite, the thought that it would be him again. Filia struggled to repress the surge of nausea when the expected sight gave way to the reality. "Good morning, Miss Filia!" "Stop." "I thought you might be waking up now, so I brought you your tea." "You're mine now." "Thank you." Her words sounded strained, even to her own ears. "Please don't do this." He cracked one eye open at her for a moment, then set the tray down. "I daresay that's the first time you've slept well in quite a while. You must not be quite awake yet." "I don't see why you think you have any say in this any longer. You belong to me." "I could use some tea, certainly," Filia whispered, a small shiver running down her spine at the memory of his hands -- too cool and too smooth to be real -- as they parted her dress, sliding across the bare skin of her back, moving it to her shoulders. "No, please." She made no attempt to stop him; there was nothing she could do, not physically. "I... yes, I am yours" -- she almost choked on the words -- "but I am not ready, not for this, please." Xellos poured the hot liquid, and handed her the cup. "Just the way you like it, Miss Filia." "You were ready for him." His voice was petulant, laced with venomous jealousy. "Thank you, Mister Xellos." It rattled slightly on the saucer as she brought it to her. She could still feel his tongue, the touch cool and dry, as it grazed over her spine and moved to her neck. Filia sipped the tea almost too quickly, still feeling his hands holding her bare hips as his teeth bit into the tender flesh of her skin. It was a bite of animalistic dominance that fell just shy of being painful while still firm enough to make her every nerve aware. "Very well, Miss Filia." It took a moment for his voice, low and purring, to register in her senses. His tongue grazed her ear gently. "I will wait." She almost yelped as he nipped her, the flesh of her neck stinging from the intensity. "For now." His hand covered her own, holding the tea steady in her grip as he moved onto the bed beside her. Xellos took care not to jostle her and cause any of the hot liquid to splash, and settled in beside her. Filia closed her eyes, a dull ache throbbing behind her temples. Why did he do this? Were it anyone else, she would actually start to think he cared. She felt his arm slip around her shoulders, pulling her against his chest as they reclined against the headboard. A giggle tried to force its way to the surface, born out of the absurdity of it, out of fear. She supposed they looked no different than any other couple, relaxing in bed and waking up together. He stroked her cheek and her neck, running his fingers through her blonde tresses with a degree of gentleness that felt as though it should be beyond his ability to achieve. Filia clung to the notion that this was all a trick, a lie, a manipulation with the same level of rabid urgency that a drowning man would cling to a rope as it gradually slipped through his fingers. The harder she held, the more it slipped away, leaving her burned and raw in its wake. Damn that little part of her, the part that wanted this to not be a lie, to believe that Xellos was right, had been right all along. It was the part that feverishly clung to the hope that she hadn't damned herself to a life devoid of love. She didn't even notice that he took her tea away until he turned her face toward him. His lips claimed hers with a calm dominance that her traitorous body felt clear down to her toes. "Just relax, Miss Filia. Everything will be fine, you'll see." When she looked into his eyes, for one scary heartbeat, she teetered on the brink of falling into endless darkness. For just that brief moment in time, it was easy to believe that he was right. It was easy to think that Valgaav was a mistake, that Xellos did love her, somehow, and that she could be happy if she would just stop fighting and accept it. Then rationale managed to gain a foothold, however tenuous, and Filia wondered, as she rested her head on his shoulder, how much more her sanity could take. Filia didn't realize she was no longer alone in the room until a hand rested lightly on her back. She jumped, looking up from her task of scrubbing the living room hearth to see Xellos crouching beside her. "You startled me." "You're just a very jumpy Dragon," he replied, giving her an amused smirk. Then his expression turned thoughtful. "On the other hand, I've never known a Dragon to not be jumpy around me." I wonder why, Filia thought sourly. He reached up, and she shivered as his gloved hand lightly stroked the back of her neck, tracing her spine. "I'm afraid I have some rather unfortunate news, Miss Filia." She felt as though she were just hit with a spell that turned her into solid ice, and sent every nerve thrumming like frozen wires. Her insides felt liquefied by the cold, and churned with queasy waves. He could mean that in any manner, for anything. Perhaps the game was up, perhaps he killed Jillas and Gravos. Perhaps Valgaav was dead. Filia struggled to fill her paralyzed lungs with air, and made a noble but vain effort to squelch the fear. Xellos opened one eye slightly and smirked. "I must say, you're quite thoughtful to provide a parting dinner for me, but really, you are overreacting. It would seem that some of Lord Dynast's minions are operating in an area which Lord Beastmaster sees as her territory, and wishes for me to resolve the situation." "You...you're leaving?" Filia sucked down a shaky gasp, filling her lungs. Dear Cephied, don't let me feel relieved! "You're happy about this?" Xellos sounded hurt. "N-no," Filia stammered quickly. "It's just not quite as bad as I thought it might be." "What did you think it might be, Miss Filia?" His voice was a soft and velvety purr, and he moved closer, his fingers sliding up the back of her neck into her hair. It could have been a lover's caress, or the preliminary motion to seize her tightly and maybe even snap her neck. "It just...it doesn't sound as though it would take too long, or be too dangerous," Filia replied, her heart beating wildly. "Not dangerous for me, at any rate." He gave her a trademark cheerful smile. "R-right." He was suspicious, she could feel it in the way he touched her, the way one eye slitted open just a fraction. Filia closed her eyes tightly and threw herself into his arms, clinging to him. "You'll come back, won't you?" Xellos was still for a moment, then his arms went around her. "Yes, of course I will, you silly Dragon." It was a rare moment when his surprise was evident in his voice. "What's gotten into you?" "I just don't want to be alone..." He chuckled. "I will always be here, don't worry about that, Miss Filia." The confused and violent roller coaster of emotions roiling inside her made it quite easy for her to induce some very real tears. She lifted her head, reaching up to hold his face between her hands gently, and kissed him, pouring in every ounce of her desperation at the whole situation into it. "Don't leave me too," she whimpered quietly, keeping her lips against his. He sighed, gripping her shoulders firmly and pushed her back, looking in her eyes with his own wide-open ones. "Miss Filia, I must leave. I cannot refuse an order from Lord Beastmaster, you know that. But I will return. Quite honestly, have you ever known me to lie?" Mutely, she shook her head. Good. It was a true assignment, and not just a ploy to trap her. "Now behave while I'm gone. I'll be back before you know it." "How long?" "I am loathe to put a timetable on it, because things can always take on unexpected twists or I may receive a new assignment stemming from this. But I can say that it will be two days at the very least." Filia nodded, closing her eyes. "Now do take care of yourself, Miss Filia. I shall return shortly." She felt his hand leave the back of her neck, and when she opened her eyes again, he was gone. Her chores forgotten, Filia pressed a hand to her still-flat abdomen. The growth of the egg remained within her draconian form, not the magic-created human body. It was very near time when she would have to lay it, but the creation of life followed its own timetable, not what was convenient. She had already foreseen the possibility, and knew what she had to do. This was as good as it was going to get. But the knowing did nothing to assuage the raw grief that was beginning to claw at her heart. The sudden deep chime of the grandfather clock sounding off the first of seven peals broke the stillness of the room and startled her. Filia looked around, noticing it had grown darker, the sun drawing down past the horizon without her realizing it. If she didn't move now, she would sabotage her own sacrifice. The thought lent a bit of strength to her resolve, and she pushed to her feet. "Jillas, Gravos?" she called, pausing by the stairs. She could hear them moving around, and knew they were still awake. A few moments later, Jillas' head peeked through the opening in the ceiling. "Yes?" "It's time." For a moment, his face was blank, then his eyes practically bulged from his head. "You... the egg... now?!" "Something like that. Could you please come down and bring Gravos, and ask Gravos to find the sharpest blade he has?" "Sure, but why?" "You'll find out. And I need him to make his sharpest blade even sharper if he can. In the meantime, go assemble the cart. I'll pack some food and supplies." Filia turned away and walked toward the kitchen. "Sure, oneesan, we're on it." Filia froze at the term of endearment, and raised suddenly damp eyes to the trapdoor where the foxman had been. She smiled briefly, feeling a pang of bittersweet pain, then shook it off, concentrating on what lay before her. "Are you sure this isn't sharp enough?" Gravos complained as she lugged a bucket of water in to the fireplace. "Let me see," Filia replied, dumping the water into the kettle, taking a moment to stir up the flames to bring it to a boil before inspecting the sword. She picked up a wooden spoon, and carefully ran the handle along the sharp edge. It sliced through the wood easily enough, but... "Try to get it a little bit sharper." "How sharp do you need this?" he demanded, raising an eyebrow with incredulous shock. "Sharp enough to cut dragonscale." Gravos was quiet for a few moments as she hurried about the kitchen, pulling things out of the larder, wrapping them in cheesecloths and packing them away in skins. "Whaddya need to do that for?" "We cannot wait. It could be tomorrow, it could be a month. I can't gamble that Xellos will be conveniently gone for nature to take its course. This is as good as its likely going to get, and I'm not going to sabotage myself by waiting." "You're gonna get killed." "Not necessarily. I've spent a lot of time thinking this through." Filia pulled the drawstrings taut, and shoved the skins of food to the end of the table. "Now go sharpen that sword, and quickly. I'll clarify things more when it's time." Filia fetched several blankets, stacking them on the table as well, and tossed a few empty waterskins on top for good measure. Hands on her hips, she looked around, studying the room. That was everything, except... She quickly raced down the hall to her bedroom, and reached into her closet for a small wooden box, far longer than it was wide or deep. Filia pulled away the latch and opened it to check the contents, nodding to herself before placing the box with the other items on the kitchen table. "The ox is ready to go," Jillas said, stepping into the kitchen. "Let's get him loaded up. Do you have the cart assembled?" "Right down to the rug basket in the case." Jillas gave her a toothy grin. "You came up with a fine invention, if I do say so myself." "Thank you, Jillas." She touched his cheek gently, then scooped up the blankets in her arms. "There's the food, and the waterskins. Keep that little box with you at all times. If you need money on the trip, there's a signet ring within. It will also grant you access to the White Magic capital when you arrive in Seyruun." Jillas opened the box and looked inside, quiet for a moment. "Should I guess the other item is for the hatchling?" Filia struggled to fight down the lump that formed in her throat, and merely nodded before ducking out of the house. Jillas helped her load up the front of the wagon with the blankets and supplies, and Filia checked her invention. The top of the wagon opened to reveal a metal box. Tiny holes peppered the bottom of the metal, opening up to the oven below. Securely strung up in the center with multiple strips of weathered rawhide was a thick, colorful, braided rug which Filia had ordered to be specially crafted into a bowl shape. It was sufficiently big to house the egg, and she carefully padded it with an additional quilt. Hopefully the rawhide would offer suspension, buffering the egg from the rough road before them. "Now what?" Jillas asked, following her into the house as she dug out a small tin of herbs. "Load up the oven with wood and coal, then take the ox around front and tether him," Filia ordered as she measured out an ample dosage of the herbs into a bowl. "Find out if Gravos is done, and have him bring out some hot coals from the fire to place in the oven. Set aside a bowl for the boiling water that's over the fire, and just before we start, bring it out, along with some towels and a blanket." She fetched several small jars out of a cabinet, and began spooning in the oil or liquid contents. "What are you doing?" "Making a tincture." "No, I mean this. Everything." "The only thing, the safest thing that can be done," Filia said, and carefully measured in teaspoons of a powder into a glass of water. "I'll explain more soon. Now go, and give me a few minutes to let me transform." She poured some precious plantain juice into a large jar, and added powdered white oak bark. Finally, she stuffed two long sacks of cheesecloth with towels and plenty of dried Purple Dead-Nettle leaves and flowers, and put them in the jar, filling the vessel with boiling water. By the time Gravos and Jillas came outside with their assigned items, Filia was reclining in the back yard. The area, which normally felt spacious, was cramped with a full Dragon taking up nearly every available inch. Her various medicinal mixtures were setting safely away by the well, save for the bowl of tincture, which had already been consumed. The narcotic effect of the herbs was kicking in, and Filia felt extremely numb and sluggish. The amount she had prepared and consumed would have been enough to kill a human, but for a Dragon, all it did was decrease her heartrate and deaden her nerves. She felt horribly awkward; in her magically-obtained human body, she was only vaguely aware of the egg's presence. Her human body showed none of the more physical signs of the pregnancy, and truly experiencing it for the first time, Filia felt uncomfortably full and queasy. Jillas set the bowl of boiling water down, and Gravos held the sharp sword carefully. Filia closed her eyes, and felt disoriented as their voices seemed to drift up to meet her from a long distance off. "What are we gonna do?" Gravos asked, studying Filia. "I've already mentioned that we can't wait for circumstances to be convenient for us, this is as good as we'll probably ever get." She spoke slowly, taking care to properly pronounce each word. She couldn't let herself fall too far into sluggishness, since she needed to keep a clear enough mind to cast a spell. "But more than that, it would be dangerous to wait." "Why?" Jillas asked. "That will be when my maternal instincts will be at their strongest. Even though I want you to leave with the egg, I may not be allowed to let you go. This way, should it even become an issue, I wouldn't be strong enough to stop you." Filia rolled onto her side, folding her wings out of the way. A hazy circle made by unburnt coal marked a section of her lower belly, and she traced the exact area with a talon. "Right here, cut as carefully as you can, Gravos. Make a simple cross-shaped incision if at all possible. Do not cut deeply, keep each cut as shallow as you can until you reach the egg." "Filia..?" "Just do it," she growled. "I won't feel it. Much. Jillas, stay with him, and once he cuts down to the egg, remove it. It will be heavy, so Gravos, take it over, be careful now, and wash it with the hot water Jillas brought out, and dry it off. Jillas, while he does that, remove those cloths from the jar by the well, and cross them over the incisions, and pour the jar's contents over the site. That will help staunch the bleeding. After you both get the egg nestled in the cart, stay with the ox, Gravos." "Got it, boss," he said. "Jillas, I'll need you to come back, and give me that glass when I ask for it, help me drink it. It's oak bark powder, and it will help fight any remaining internal bleeding. I'll be casting spells, so it won't be long. Stay until the wound is healed up enough for me to risk transforming, and help me inside. Then go. Go quickly, and don't look back. While you're waiting, you can use that time to pack up your things." Jillas didn't answer, but hugged her long neck tightly instead. "Do it now." "Right. Jillas, get over here." Filia slammed her talons into the ground, clutching to it. Even with the tincture in her system, it took all her willpower to keep from crying out as she felt the blade delve deeper inside. |
to be continued...
Chapter Eleven